I love the cast of the WDW Today podcast - total nut jobs. They really do come up with some great show topics. Afterwards I always want to post my full length, opinionated dissertations on their website...but I resist.
So that I won’t explode, I’ve decided to use this blog as my outlet. These type posts will always direct you back to their website and in specific to the show / show notes. That way you can experience some of their shenanigans for yourself and see why it prompted me to write out my thoughts. I’ll also include some of my thoughts about the show which will probably make more sense if you listen to it.
My first attempt comes from Episode 808 - Gifts From The World. My favorite of all the gifts was when Annette from MEI & Mouse Fan Travel says that Santa has granted her wish for an all adult restaurant and resort. Amen sister!! There is a reason that some species eat their young...I’m just sayin’. Here’s my take on the show idea...
It’s Christmas morning..your hair resembles a birds nest and your breath could take down an elephant. It’s 5 a.m. and your family appears to be “sleeping in”.
Quietly you sneak down the stairs and peek around the corner into the living room. As you stand there wearing your footed Christmas PJ’s, you behold the expansive toy monorail track which took you almost a day to set up so that it wrapped around the Christmas tree and makes visits to every room downstairs. As multiple monorails enter and exit the room you hear those comforting words “Please stand clear of the doors...”
Along the track are 5 scaled down versions of the park icons with big bows on top...Cinderella’s Castle, Spaceship Earth, the Tree of Life, some big blue hat thing with Mickey Mouse ears sticking out the sides, and a ridiculous red and yellow Characters In Fight balloon hovering above the ground, but anchored to the floor.
Your anticipation builds as you take it all in, but as you go to step foot in the room your visiting parents appear out of nowhere, grab you by the back of your PJ’s and declare that from page 167 of the “How To Raise Dysfunctional Children At Any Age” handbook, you must eat breakfast before any presents can be opened. What the... After breakfast though comes the gluttony!
Before you open the first icon your parents tell you that Satan - I’m sorry...Santa...Santa has taken all of your suggestions for attraction, park, resort area changes & additions under advisement and has granted some of your wishes!!!
So what did I wish for?
I sit down next to Cinderella’s Castle and know that this will contain my wishes for the Magic Kingdom. I open the castle and three miniature’s fall out.
The first is a tiny stadium bleacher. How odd. The card reads...”For the nighttime Wishes spectacular and evening parades, we will be bringing out several stadium bleachers to accommodate more viewers and to leave clear paths on the sidewalks. In order to be seated on the bleachers your entire party must be present and remain seated once you are given seats!”
Next I pick up a miniature TTA attraction vehicle. The card reads...”The Tomorrowland Transit Authority will expand the track for this non-stop bird’s eye view of the park to include all the Lands in the Magic Kingdom. I can only imagine what Wishes will look like from this fleeting vantage point, and oh how beautiful the park will look at night!
The third miniature is a pair of chop sticks. The card reads...”The second floor of the Tomorrowland Noodle Station will be converted to a viewing area for Wishes. Seating is limited to Annual Pass holders.”
Wow, Santa was busy this year!!! I place the miniatures back inside the castle and take a moment to decide which icon to open up next.
I scoot along the floor (gathering dangerous amounts of static as I go) until I come to Spaceship Earth.
As I pull back the top Walter Cronkite says to me “For you - oh clever one - a kite, a bottle of wine and a French pastry are all it will take to make you happy”. (I understand that there is a Judy Densch voice recorder version of Spaceship Earth out, but I’m a purist.)
From the “golf ball” I pick up the tiny kite and read the tag attached to the kite tail...”The Universe of Energy attraction will be retired and refurbished to make way for the next generation of Soarin fans!
The attraction will feature two adventure options - Soarin’ the Wonders of the World (both man made and natural wonders) and Soarin’ Over The States.” Although film production is not complete, in my mind Soarin’ Over the States would include every tacky road side adventure that’s offered - to include Stuckey’s...but that’s just my preference.
Next, I pull the cork from the wine bottle and uncurl the paper inside...”Moving Soarin’ means that several new changes will come to The Land pavilion. Sunshine Season’s will expand to offer many more food selections - to include vegetarian and vegan options & the seating capacity will more than double.” Since I’m neither vegetarian or vegan I pause to wonder if Santa heard me right.
“In addition, an expansive tapas and full service bar will make their home here offering a large selection of foods featured at our annual Food and Wine Festival.
However, during the Food Wine Festival this will convert to a “watering hole” for adults 21 and older.” In my mind, attached to the watering hole is a sound proof room to drop your kids off at for an hour...or twelve. There will be games, movies and every Disney toy ever conceived - oh, and a tiny kid-friendly buffet.
I can’t help but wonder what the tag on the tiny French pastry will say...”Beginning in 2011 France will offer a late night pastry delivery service to any on-site Disney hotel.”
Oh...it’s going to be a dangerous year at Disney for me...
The next stop along my monorail line is at the Tree of Life.
The tree top comes off and I hear a lion’s roar. I pull back the tissue to find a miniature pair of walking shoes, a safari themed metal cast bus and a miniature clock...
I press the button on top of the bus and hear...”The Animal Kingdom’s Safari attraction will undergo an extensive refurbishment and will now include animals which can be see throughout the day! (Not just 8 a.m. to 9:15 a.m.)
Do YOU see the lion? Yeah, me neither, but the other 28 people on the bus swore to me it was there.
..."And not just any animals, ALL of the animals from the ID boards located in each attraction vehicle." (I’m betting that invisible fences and fur/skin coated shock collars are how this will be accomplished) "The vehicles will stop for longer periods of time for photo opportunities and the elephant from the end of the tour has been released to roam the Savannah, which is now poacher free.” It’s about dang time. I was getting tired of saving the SAME elephant over and over...again - I think it comes back to the “why some species eat their young” theory.
The tag hanging from the walking shoes is exciting! The tag reads...”For animal enthusiasts, and the lot of you who wish to forgo the kidney crushing / “I need a telescopic lens to see some of the animals” safari bus...we’re proud to present a fully enclosed, climate controlled walking path which connects all areas of the safari tour with the jungle treks! It will bring you closer to the animals than ever before!”
While the clock ticks away, I find that...”The park will remain open one and a half hours after sunset. As we put our animals to bed, grab an adult beverage and take the time to explore the park at night. Find the hidden paths to get up close to all the animals carved into the Tree of Life...wander the pale lit continents of Africa and Asia while taking in the sounds of the local villages...stop a moment to appreciate Expedition Everest by the moonlight. Mickey might even make an appearance on the mountain as he continues on in his quest to the top!”
The lime green monorail just caught my eye and I find myself looking up to see a big blue sorcery hat. Ah yes, this means I find out which of my wishes will be coming true for the Hollywood Studios.
I pull the left ear down and out from the top of the hat pops up a note which says...”Big mistake on our part...we’re starting over, doubling it’s size, and will be showing Fantasmic ever night.”
I have to chuckle, but then notice that the right ear on the hat can be pulled down as well. This time the note pops up and says “JUST KIDDING about the “big mistake on our part”! In addition to doubling the park size and a nightly showing of Fantasmic, there were a couple of your other wishes granted...
First on the list...”The original Backlot Tour path will be restored to its original glory and the props shop will be expanded!”
Second...”We’re creating a permanent area for the Osborne Spectacle of Dancing Lights...
...so that the shock of seeing them being put up in August is reduced - but it will remain a seasonal exhibit. The display will be 100% LED lights, the streets/walkways will be widened, the song “Feliz Navada” will be removed from the radio broadcast and the broadcast can only be heard by special disposable wireless headphones!” Hey, it’s my wish list, not yours!
At this point I’m simply overwhelmed but there is still one more Walt Disney World area to visit on my wish list tour. I think it’s going to be Downtown Disney but find that it includes a mixture of wishes granted in other areas of the World.
I pop the Characters In Flight balloon...cause that’s what we all want to do with it, tell the truth.
Out from the balloon comes several tiny scrolls tied with red ribbon.
The first scroll reads “In Downtown Disney, every store will be doubled in size so that more than 20 people can walk around inside comfortably. The Lego building will become two story. The top floor will be an indoor play area and downstairs there will be multiple merchandise catalog kiosks - place your order and a cast member behind the scenes will pull your merchandise for pick-up at the registers. Adult beverage carts will be located near each entrance."
My second scroll had to do with three new tours offered in each of the parks!!
“For each tour, a cast member will accompany your small group (no more than 10 guests) for approximately 3 hours prior to park opening.
“The first new tour is for “seasoned photographers”! You will stop in each land and this will be your opportunity to take photos of anything in the park without 2000 strangers in your photo. Imagine...an empty Main Street!”
“The second tour will be guided by a professional Disney photographer and is designed for guests who want to learn the “how to’s” of capturing those special vacation memories - camera settings, background composition and people arrangement are just a few of the topics you’ll cover.”
“The third new tour we’re offering this year is for attraction enthusiasts. This is an opportunity to photograph the details of the que’s and buildings, then walk inside the attraction and capture the various scenes!”
I simply can’t believe it! What a Christmas!!
Before I open my last scroll, I pause and think...somebody pinch me - this can’t be real!!!
I untie the ribbon and uncurl the scroll. It’s a short, sweet note that reads...
Dear Caryn,
Get a life.
With Love (and concern),
Your Family & Friends
Needless to say when I do wake up from this dream I’m drenched in sweat, breathing hard and begin sucking my thumb...THIS is going to require therapy.
Happy Holidays from a Disney fan with WAYYYYY too much time on her hands. May all your “blue sky” wishes come true in 2011!!
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